Tommy: “Are you a Mac guy?”

Me: “Yeah, I have like five.”

George: “No wonder you vote Democrat!”

Me: “I own Macs, I grow a beard, I love my TiVo, and I drive a Subaru. Damn straight I voted for Obama.”

Tommy: “You forgot to mention that you’re a Methodist.”

To be clear, I don’t consider myself a Democrat. I’m slightly left of center these days, but I would vote for a moderate Republican—though those are becoming a dying breed.